What’s great about space is that you never know what the hell is going to happen. Here on Earth wild ish doesn’t really happen that much, sometimes you luck out and you go to a party where everyone’s just losing their shit and maybe some lady takes off her shirt or theres pyrotechnics or a dude dreseed as cookie monster comes through and starts handing out Entemann’s soft baked chocolate chip cookies - those joints are magically delicious, but otherwise crazy shit doesn’t really happen. Now in space you might just be chilling out on the farm minding your beeswax and then one day blaow! you’re part of an intergalactic resistance and getting your hand chopped off by your pops while you ride around with a 7 ft tall Pommeranian looking dude, Indiana Jones and Billy Dee Williams. Now that’s what I call a chain reaction.
That’s if you’re lucky though.
If you’re not lucky you end up on a bootleg ass Italian version of that same story and you realize you’re a young David Hasselhoff tooling around with a dollar store lightsaber in Star Crash. That’s still a much more exciting look than my typical Friday night, I’m not having laser battles with robots…yet. But not quite as epic as the events of Star Wars. But, maybe you’re a young lady and instead of kicking ass while wearing the ill gold bikini and NOT sleeping with your unknown-to-you-at-the-time brother (wouldn’t that have been weird), you end up in the softcore porn version of Small Wonder. Galaxina though, does get to hang out with the “international jetset” - assuredly a plus. While Darth Vader may have been the baddest, blackest mofo this side of Jim Kelly in Three The Hard Way, something tells me he wasn’t exactly on a 24 hour champagne diet.
In either scenario though, even the poor man’s version of space seems like a killer time from our point of view. Laser fights and sassy gay robots being the bare minimum. Adorably angry native teddy bears and Playboy Playmates dressed in Lady Gaga hand me down costumes being the maximum of awesome. Let’s not get too down on our lives here though, because while space heads get all that and the chance to party with aliens, sometimes we go in just as hard here on earth.
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Comments ( 3 )
[...] Space Is The Motherfucking Place [...]
Space Is The Motherfucking Place added these pithy words on Jan 02 10 at 9:16 amnumber18 added these pithy words on Dec 16 09 at 4:21 pmAll right, I posted this on my twitter, but I’d like to toss it out here and see if you get me, considering this post: If I say “Lynn Minmei” and “Lady Gaga” together, will anyone else get the correlation??
ray added these pithy words on Dec 16 09 at 4:42 pmRobotech? like I just remember she was the rockstar GF. You’ve out nerded me here. Please drop knowledge jewels
